Sunday, August 28, 2011

The Beginning of Transition

It's a bit of a laugh really, the idea of me writing a blog. I was only able to journal consistently for three months of my life. The majority of my journals sit on a shelf, the first few pages filled with the well-intentioned marks of middle school, high school, and college. I'm not usually one to convert my personal reflections into something visible. I would much rather have a conversation, but as that will soon not be as possible, this will have to do. It's part of my adaptation.


I am at the beginning of transition... again. It's been over two years since the last time I moved which is the longest I've lived in one place since I was in high school. Whether that will make this transition more difficult or not, I have yet to determine. At the beginning, change doesn't always feel real. My mind acknowledges that I will be returning to the Near East in only a few months, but it fades to the background in the face of the present circumstances. Occasionally I get glimpses of the change to come, moments when I am either stunned or excited. Mostly though, the transition proceeds without my recognition.

I am reminded of one afternoon when, walking down the streets of a city in Jordan two years ago, I was hit with how normal I felt. My setting was vastly different than any I had experienced before, but that didn't seem to make any difference. I've come to the realization that as long as I focus on my one Constant, the transition loses its oddity: Past, present, and future can overlap in my mind without sending me into emotional upheaval. Funny how that works.